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Forbes who loves this gal very much

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It all matters when you come to a certain stand still.. Should i say finally i'm going to put it down? Or shall i be the idiotic fool? Curiosity betrayed.. i know it felt cheap and i'm just dirtified. Will i ever live with it, or will i not look forward again? Shall i wisen up? it's just this mindset that is at last tarnished and i'm fighting for the believe.

I know now it's like nothing. Is all of it so worth it? You just feel your heart shredded and then stitched up and then squeezed.. Forget it, it's all i really want. I don't wish to linger on with the tainted memories. i learned from the fence that it will be repeatable and i don't want to get caught by it. What happens to mi seems to happen on the rest.. I really see the importance i have been. Always there and there, but never there.

I see what i see and i know.. it's too bad. For me.. i can never make do with it. It cuts down deep and for all i know.. i'm reminded by my mistakes. This is my weakness, it's acting up.. Hurting me softly, hurting me slowly.. Long and long it has been. And at last i set myself free. Forsake the happinees, the memories and the one.

i've given up on myself..

Seems to be futile.. Is it understood or is it something else? keeping on to that tiny little faith.. tell mi where do i start? Do i look like some commodity or am i a jewel? Don't push me away. Don't leave me alone. Don't use me. Don't go!

How do I get close, a moment of her time just seems impossible to me.. It’s hard to find the words. Cause, I can’t keep on feeling the way I do.. I can’t keep on, hiding my heart from you. I got to say something before, someone else comes through.. I can’t keep on loving you, from a distance. She’s always on my mind, there’s no room left for thinking.. I’m tired of waiting, slowly fading.. It needs to happen now. Cause i’m running out of time, and I feel this ship is sinking. The doors are closing and I am frozen.. I need her around. I can't hide it.. But, that's not going to happen. I know it's hard to get back the things in the past.. Regrets.

Lifelong mistake that i've ever made.. Childish and foolish. What i did, was stupid.. But it's all for you. Not mi, not us.. I don't get it. Are you happy?

It all comes to a stand still now.. Everything's done and now is time. The days of endless pursing of contentment, happiness, surprise and waiting for someone.. Stripped of dignity, pride, selflessness, commitment, priority and giving.. I lay myself out. Did the best i can ever possibly do.. As i always tried. Ignoring all the nags from all round.. It all matters for a second. And then, i know.. Struck by the ever heavy weight of inferiority, judgement, jealousy, bitterness and longing. i hide it.. The posture, actions, conversations and comparity. I see it..

My mind hit by many rebounds.. Speeding through the island, to get as much happy-saving tokens. And i admit, a few sticks and half bottle to accompany me was just enough.. for one night.

It's not my stage now, no more fairy tale princess, tiaras, glass slippers and her face. It's what the best awaits.. Letting go.

It gets me thinking.. For feelings with attachment, it dwells within. I guess i ought to change my mind.. Somehow you think that it's right, but in fact it's wrong. I cant really tell which side but now maybe i'll make it up. I don't wish to regret if it begets me in future. I know it's my vulnerability.. For the things in the past and for those to come, i don't know what i'll be in for. Helping others but i can't help myself.. I'll throw this hope; this little wish. Cause i know i can't pick up and go back again.. Things that are lost are not meant to be found. And there's only future, no hope behind.. So i really wish upon the shooting star on my birthday. If only it came through..

CUI.. All i can say. It's all in the mind actually.. Glad that it's over and thankful that i didn't fall out. Now full of bruises, rash and cuts. It was fun though, although i just cant wait to get home. On the night of stars, i chance upon a shooting star.. Great is the moon, duty was just reflection. Getting lost and wandering in the abyss of twinkers.. All thoughts come to you. Well, a letter of tears just said it all.. The 21st was unexpected. Rained like hypos and elephants and slept in the freezing mud.. A group of guards surrounded mi at midnight, caught me when i was sleeping. It was memorable, with my buddies, my rifle and me.

I'll appreciate everything that i have and love.. Not that i didn't but i straightened up. All i want to say is, i still do..

RECOVER.

Thinking about some stuffs and i chanced upon a thought about forgetting. There are things we want to forget and things we want to keep.. Is there time or will i remember? What happens if one day i forget everything? Will i still remember?

Here's what i hope i will remember:
5 years of friendship
Playing for her wedding song
070509
No bday
The lie
Her

If i could, i will want to forget everything else.. Dreadful week ahead. Mudcake on monday..

Hope.. Is all i can have. Realised it's actually a one way trip.. It must have hurt somehow but still, just go on. I know things doesn't change because you want it to.. All the more, it's been a repetition. Seeing what i see, hearing what i heard.. It's all there. For all their concerns, i know what i'm doing.. I feel happy this way. Can't i be like this? All i ever wanted was the happiness i see.. no one will understand. It's hard.. hard.

Somethings are hard to express.. All i know is smiling when you know you're not happy. It's hard but that's all you can do. Rather suffer alone then to make the other hurt.. So, i just want to laugh it off. Make myself feel better. Can i ever put it down and give my blessings? It's not about mi or us.. It's about her. It's good to know she's happy..

Am i dumb? laugh it off.. i still don't know what i'm gonna do. Should i take the transit and just bail out of here? Or should i carry on.. It matters so much and i don't think anyone will understand. It's for the wonderful memories, not what to expect.. Trying hard without feeling attached. It's hard to get back what you lost, when you realised it.. You imagine it. Everything reminds you of something dear.. The recollections like snaps flashing through, reminsince it, endowell it but it's never coming back. Living in the dreams of something you can only yearn for, the feeling so long, so tragic.. Like a poison you desire. At times you don't want to forget, it lingers..

i'm stuck in the past. Unwind..

Its been rough.. living in blurs. No 21 for me.. i passed my age.

Because i'm so foolish, i know only you..
You who are looking at someone else,
You probably don't know my heart.
There is no me in your day,
Probably not even in your memories..
But i'm looking at only you as my tears continue to fall.
I'm happy with looking at your back figure,
Though you still don't know my heart..
Though at the end, you'll just brush past me.

The days that i miss you so much..
The days when it's too hard to bear.
The words i love you lingers on my lips.
Once again, alone, crying for you..
Once again, alone, missing for you..
Baby, i love you.
I'm waiting for you..

There is no me in your day,
Probably not even in your memories.
But i'm looking at only you,
Making memories by myself..

Bye bye, never say goodbye..
Though i can't hold onto you.
I need you, i can't say anything else..
I want you, i'll wish and wish again.
The days when you fill up my thoughts..
The days when my heart grows cold and i'm sad.
The words i miss you lingers on my lips.
Once again, alone, crying for you..
Once again, alone, missing for you..
Baby, i love you.
I'm waiting for you..

The flock of birds making merry, the lonely moon, the dangling fan.. I look out of the square and let my mind wonder. Days seems to be the same, nights seems to be sane.. One thought to keep me awake, one memory to keep it all going, one person to repeat it again. I wonder, isit time yet? Or should i just let it be.. Am i right to do something that worthy, or should i not. It seems like i should but there's hesitation in me.. I'm not going to think the way i am anymore. I know i want it so much but at the same time i cannot bring myself to it. I did what i should and can and it's not about me.. So, let the feelings flow through the efidgey and let fate do the rest. It's predestinated.. My hopes on my wish. I don't get it.. only you.

Pictures of you on my mirror.. Staring. Thinking. Spacing. Sometimes just taking a few seconds to unwind.. Cry. Was it right to place it there? Reverse. Time. Memory. It wasn't what i was expecting.. Just a reminder. You came into my life..

Long hair, puppy eyes. Shorts..
Having this weird feeling.. Cant really imagine it or want to. I'll wait and see..

I guess.. i got too much time to think. She was right.. But i guess it only takes 2 weeks instead of 2 years for mi to become someone different. i gotten my priorities right and i know what's my focus and future plans. I'll put what's left at the back of my head.. i've seen enough and i don't wish to go down memory lane again. It's futile isn't it.. With this new divide, things wont be the same. Time and time i asked myself if it's what i wanted.. Now i know, to appreciate and never take for granted. I promise i'll be a better person..

Just a gentle whisper
Told me that you'd gone
Leaving only memories;
Where did we go wrong..
I couldn't find the words then.
So let me Say them now,
I'm still in love with you.

Tell me that you love me,
Tell me that you care,
Tell me that you need me,
And I'll be there..
I'll be there waiting..
I will always love you,
I will always stay true..
No one else will love you like I do.

Come to me now..
I will never leave you,
I will stay here with you.
Through the good and bad I will stand true,
I'm in love with you..

All i want to say after so long, with everything that happened.. Is this poem. Take care and stay happy alright..

It seems like there's so much to understand.. A sip of coffee, a view by the window and small little thoughts. I just want to know who i am, i don't want the world to see me.. Cause they don't know who i am. I found meaning through the silence and unspoken.. I just want you to know who i am.

Some stuffs keeps getting to your head.. i don't really know what to do now. I knew from making the choice, that i cant go back to it. I'm guilty of it.. i really wish that it wouldnt end up like this. But there's no other way, im compelled. i still love her, but i wont show it to her because she has another one. i hope to pretend that i dont like her anymore.. it's hard. All this time, i've been wanting her to feel happy.. Hope it goes well this way. I don't care being a bad guy, but for her happiness. i will.. She doesn't know or must not know it. Cause i really sacrificed my happiness for it. Maybe she doesn't really believe mi anymore. But as long as i know, i will still wait for her. There's a distance between us now, and it just feels sad to know.

I guess it's hard to think that who matters most.. All i need was support, and i always wanted support. Seems to be that i know whos' true.. i really am confused right now. For that choice i made.. I know it wasn't for me, but i cannot let myself feel so sad. It will be so worth it if she doesn't know and stays happy for what she have rigth now.. i dont want things to end up like this. But, it's tough when u have to make a choice that didn't only consist of yourself. I wish her happiness..

Great.. I'm done right now. Being numb or dumb will more or less aid the plan.. I know what i've done. If she knows, she will understand why.. i hope? But, that will be too late. You think you understand mi? haha.. what if i'm just feeding you with something you thought it's true.. Never thought of it? haha. Beats mi too.. i did too much, but maybe this was the most painful one. Well, best you not know.. Things have been great for you from what i know. i can only say, it's worth it (=

Well.. there's just less than 3 weeks for me. Can see that things are progressing the way it is as i thought out.. Somethings, it is better to be not let known or kept this way.. Trying to keep it the way it is. It will be the greatest decision that i've made.. Call mi foolish, call mi silly. It doesn't matter anymore.. As long as she will be happiler. I dont care all the hate or the lies on me.. It will be for this greater cause. I guess i don't deserve so much.. Even if being a bad guy for a day or maybe for a very very long time will be worth it. I'm totally not the one. Someone else will take my place.. Concealing, inside.

Well, now i have a habit to think of things properly when i jog.. And somehow, it helps. Hmmm, another one has come into the picture.. I expect more to come? guess i'm trying to close an eye.. Let her be the way she is, and do what she wants. But, i don't really know should i give in my all for her? Like right now, im doing my best.. And will i be able to sustain that long? Waiting.. I really love her and if that's the way things are, then i'll be comtemplated with it. Haix.. Just want her to be happy.

All these while, i wasn't good enough for her..

Sitting by the bed. Quiet and peaceful.. The colour of darkness, rotation of the fan and her deep breathing. Thoughts just flows through my mind.. It's just a moment that all my troubles went away.. Her sweet and tired expression makes me feel relax, she's safe and trouble won't find her. Taking time to ponder, it's the only place i can feel secure, happy.. Lots have happened, just sorting my feelings out. I will be fine..

The long walk home. Everything seems to be in a mess.. You dont know what hit you. The feeling is like a truckload banging you. So many things in my mind.. There's no one i can talk to. Or in actual fact, there's no one who cares? I've been keeping stuffs in my head. This, that and everything.. And with the recent events, i'm somehow drowned. Not mentioning but just reminding myself about it. It anchors heavily.. I can only depend on myself, i'm always alone with problems. It's not like how u think.. It's not what i wanted. I'm all like this because of that.. You will never know, or best not know. Maybe when the time is right, but time seems to be agaisnt mi.. I hate the seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years. Time doesnt stops, it spoils your day, your plan and the finger is on you. It made mi wasted..

I'm just so imperfect, every bit of me is wrong somehow.. Never really did something that perfect to the eyes of the behlder. i want to grow up.. Seeing my state, i yearn for wisdom. To the point that feelings will just pass and you will be immune to the flesh. That's right, i'm enslaved. I thought i'm able to handle, but i'm broken.. All i want is happiness for the other person, but am i cursed that she has to suffer. It's not fair, it's like things are not meant to be.. Am i trying too hard? Fuck it.. I cant even hold dear to something more important than myself, how can i still be living?

i'm sorry, i am your misery..

It's hard to fathom the uncontentment.. Or purely just unfairness. It's just tough living on it and knowing that at the end of the day you will be disappointed. Miserable. Decrepated. And thinking about it all night long.. You know how haunting it is? Well, now it is the stage where you know you're suffering and hurting but u just accept it and still treat it as nothing. It's an on-going cycle. And i'm always left alone to pick up the pieces.. You only wish for her to feel good but just neglecting how you feel. Don't you agree that it's worth it? I do! And i changed through this.. Maybe i don't understand what i become too? Where are all the feelings? Does it get filtered through until there isn't any left? The thing in life is, the one you love most.. Hurts you most. Or something u want but it will never be yours.. That's how things is. The redundancy of those unfortunate.. You can only watch from a distance that the happiness you want is just before you but out of reach. A poison that brings incompetence, lowliness, estem-less, insecurity.. Understand?

But i dont feel that anymore.. I'll be happy for no matter what. I still love her..

The undying love. She wont notice it anyway..

To the foolish mi:

Life took a turn for itself.. The truth is unravelled and the feelings just spurges out. Took it quite hard, never to recover..

My story is like the OC.. A drama. I can say it's the begining of season 4 and i'm just part of the support character that fades miserably or gets lesser script lines. Not meant to have an air time with the lead actress. No oscars or best supporting actor award for mi. Condolences is all i need. Am i still casting for the next season too? Truly i'm not goodlooking or have what it takes to make it to the A list. Well, i have to make do with that..

Guess, i'll never look back to the past.. Forgive mi, for i cant save myself. Who should?

Sometimes i try to hide what i'm feeling inside, i just can't figure it out. Tell mi why you're so hard to forget, don't remind mi.. i'm not over it. Tell mi why i cant seem to face the truth, i'm really just so not over you. i cant get over it.. I'll never understand.

It's just her.. The way she is and what she does. She has all the attention she wants.. She got everything she can ask for. And what am i? Well, that doesnt matter.. i know what i'm in now and i'll still be who i am.. Because no matter what is to happen, it will never deter mi from loving her. It's just the same usual routine that i have to go through telling myself that i wont give up. Until i know that i really have to.. But, not now..

If only she sees..

It's just so her.. Well, it really did inflict back the pain that i never wanted to feel.. I knew it from the start.. Gosh, it cuts deep into my flesh. Argh.. i dont want to read in too much. Guess, i'm done..

Every time you walk away or run away you take a piece of me with you there.. Oh it seems like I’m walking right to your door. With my hearts still resting, looking for something more.. Are you ever going to see everything you mean to me? I’m trying very hard to believe.. Nothing feels right when I’m left here on my own. Left last night.. It seemed like I waited too long. Are you going to ever see everything you mean to me? I’m trying very hard to believe.. Come back to me, you smile and you make my life complete.. Every time you walk away or run away you take a piece of me with you there.

I just wanna be alone tonight.. I just wanna take a little breather. Cause lately all we do is fight and every time it cuts me deeper. Without you, I live it up a little more everyday.. Without you, I'm seeing myself so differently. i'm not fine without you..

Well, i'm not doing so good i guess.. What i can say is i'm stress. Lots of thinking and emotions running through my head.. you dont have confidence in mi? That's quiet hard for mi to swallow.. I know you deserve better from mi.. I just cant get it why can i suddenly make u angry? i tried my best in making things right, but somehow i'm just unlucky. Am i that stupid or life is playing with mi? I hate wasting time emo-ing and trying to speak up for myself.. i rather make u happy. But, i really need lots of time now to change my habit of making you angry.. Please please have faith with mi. i really love you and i hate treating you like this..

After a long and tired day.. With troubles on my shoulders, went home to get a beat down. Just too tired to even bother, but felt regretful for refruting it. I know what i want, i do what i like and just dont bother so much about mi. it's hard to leave a long lasting good impression..

Was it something that i said? was it something that i do? Cause i gotta know what makes mi unbeautiful.

Sometimes the things you do for a person, might not know how much it means to you.

Haix.. sucks man. Spoilt your day.. Argh~ the last thing i want to know is you being angry. All my fault.. I'm sorry. I didnt intend to forget, it just slip my mind.. And let mi get something straight, it's not whether anything that is important, i will remember. I do forget important things like driving test, project meetings and appointments.. And to mi, everything about u is important! It just hurts to know that i dont treat you important.. Well, i just hope u will shimmer down. i really want to see and talk to you again.. Guess i wont be sleeping well tonight. 

A warm bath is all i need after a long day.. Hope my hard work pays off. Well, somehow certain things arent favorable. But i'll get by it.. i must work hard. To mi, i will definitely sacrifice for something worth it. i need rest now..  

Guess it's time to grow up.. i've made up my mind. I'm just going to focus on my studies, projects and work till feb. It's just that i think i'm not serious enough with myself. Moreover, i must save up to go to America. I want to travel on my own and maybe be away as long as i can.. And i'm going to work hard to get my car.. Well, i can foresee that certain things wont look so good. But, whatever.. i will cope with it. You just do whatever you like, i wont have anything to add on. You must been having great fun, just so hard to see your greetings..

Confuse? Well, guess so.. A new year and soon, a new mi. It's a great trip down memory lane and i'm glad i can take some with mi. Even though you wont be spending NYE with mi, just hope you will enjoy yourself..

Here is the thing.. i know i'll be heart broken but if i dont know means i dont know. i want to know, but only the nice words.. I'll treat it as i dont know anything for now cause i havent hear from you. i dont know what to do right now.. i must not assume.

If.. argh. Forget it.. Hope you find your happiness again. i know from the beginning, there isn't a place for mi in your heart.

Somehow, i start to feel that there's not much time left.. There's so many things that i want to do and stuffs unfulfilled. I dont want to regret anything and i really want to appreciate all that i have. But i know what are my priorities. There's nothing pessimistic with how i feel, just want to live to the fullest.

Well.. Guess i've already know what's my resolution after the past weeks. hmmm, what have i been thinking for the past days? how did i feel? Guess i cant enjoy the last day of the year with you.. Haix. it's alright.. From the way that you treat mi, i can somehow get an idea.

Maybe i was alittle too late.. hope that the new year will be a better one and a better me. So close, so far..

Argh.. Dunno why do i feel bugged this few days. Some feelings are just so tiresome.. The worrying kind of feeling is just so energy consuming, the waiting feeling is just so so slow, the jealous feeling is just so irritating and the loving feeling is just undying. i love you so much! and even if i have to endure this, you are just so worth it.

I feel.. somehow. You're different now.. i dont know but just sense that you cant be bothered about mi anymore like you used to. Isit true? i dont know..

Thinking through my new year's resolution.. had in mind but it might change in the days to come. Just so happy to see you again.

hmmm.. what's wrong? fucking hell no idea.. Why arent you the same anymore? why arent you replying my msgs? the problem sure lies with mi and i dont even have an idea what i did wrong.. haix.. feeling damn vexed over it. came back from clubbing and i illegally drove home.. but just have to blog this. i'm so so so troubled by this!!! will i lose you? i really dont want to.. xmas is nearing and new year. If this goes on, what a nice close for the year it will be. Alone and broken..

I dont know what's wrong.. but it just cant get off my mind. Why isit at the biting point right now? I know what i really want but can things just be alittle better? Xmas and New Year is coming.. So many things lined up for mi but i just dont want them. i spend the recent days doing project, going out, chilling, bar-ing and also K-ing.. Plus i'm clubbing tml. Hmmm, i just feel very awkard without you.. Things dont seemed right and it's always missing you. Well, thought of something great to spend the New Year's eve.. But, i dont think you are available. Haix.. Vex-ed.

Haix.. just damn tired. Sucks being sick. Argh~ Worse thing is a made you angry again.. Wth, throat is killing mi and the cough so irritating. My mind is all about you now.. Thinking whether will you forgive mi and stop being angry and just missing you. i need sleep..

Well, just dont get it.. Why i keep doing stuffs that makes you mad? Hmmm, i dont want to be remembered for all the sad memories or bad times i gave you. Just very upset when that happens.. i want to be important and someone you can rely on.. Not just some friend. Just hope you will chill down.

Well, i dont feel quite great.. Just so tired. Somehow something is lacking.. It's not like the same and more of the i'm doing more kind. Will she ever get it? Maybe not.. Just feel that i'm not happy already. Cant i get it back? i wish i can but it's been so long.. i really really want to. Well, guess i'll just have to bear with it. In the end, my mind is just about her..

My name is stupid and hurting you is my game.. Why are things just so rough this days? I didnt even feel that you enjoyed the time i spent with you. More like you're angry.. I dunno what went wrong and it's like practically almost everything, i will be at fault.. I dont blame you but i'm just very tired that stuffs keep coming at mi, making things worse and worse. I tried to do alot of things to cheer you up or brighten your day but it never ended great.. i'll just be in a postion to be stupid and get scolded again. Seems like i brought you alot of trouble.. disturbing you, irritating you, making you moodless, making you mad, making you sad, making you sleep so late, making you fat and troubling you. I'm just so troublesome am i? Maybe i shouldnt have gone to see you this few days.. Might save your life, energy and breathe on a scumbag like mi? Guess you wuldnt want to meet mi or talk to mi for the next few dunno how many days? i'll just emo alone. Goodness sake for crying out loud.. i'm just a loser.. Never important in your life. Brought you hurt, pain, sadness and unhappiness.. Fuck mi for wanting to be a better man when i'm not even a good friend! Can we ever go back to where we last enjoyed ourselves? i wonder?

Just so shiity.. why do i feel so weak? i want myself to know that i wont let myself lose you so easily.. but, sometimes it's just quite simple for mi to see the reality. i'm just inferior.. looks, brains, money.. There's sure some guy that's better than mi out there. Just cant help but compare and i got nothing to show.. whatever it is, i just doesnt make mi feel great. im getting aliitle paranoid maybe.. im just scared of losing you. But no matter what, i dont care what's gonna befall mi. i only want to make myself a better person, a better guy and that's all i want for now.. Because i really need you to see who i really am. Not some guy with brains or looks or money.. sorry for not giving you the best this few days. on my stupid streak again..

It's just sucks to make you sad, angry or no mood.. Haix, why am i always being so stupid? Say stuffs before i think, being slow and stupid. I'm sorry for treating you like this.. I dunno, but it's just some random stupidness that came out of mi. Seeing you so angry, attitude and moody.. It's like i can go bang the wall a million times until i bleed like hell or it's just the pain that i feel like jumping off the building (not that i will). And when you dont forgive mi, i just dunno what to do but just curse myself or just meditate on my stupidness. I wished that this stupidness dont always come when ur period is nearing. If not, im so screwed. But the thing is, i just want to see you more and talk to you after that. Because, i lost that amount of time needed to bring you happiness and love. So, i just wanna makeup to it. haix.. Cant get to see you tml. Guess you still have alittle resentment on what i said.. i deserve to get slap *pak*

I've reflected on my way home and i came to a point that i feel i should continue to love you, or love u even greater. You know why? Because after whatever wrongs i did to you and promises that i've broken, the more i should love you as i have a responsibility in it and i want to be a part in your life. I'm serious for the relationship we are in and it's not some 'come and go' sort of thing and i'm ready to give you my commitment, to take care of you for the rest of my life and never leave you. And i finally see why i cant put u down, it's because i want to be responsible for you and put your future in mine. Just now was one of the worst times of my life because i really made you hate mi and i feel so disappointed, so full of hate for myself, so regretful to cost you this hurt and im really afraid of not seeing you again. I wasnt really thinking at that point in time to stop you. i admit it's stupid of mi but i will live with it as a guilt. Well, the scar is there and i really hope to mend it and regain your trust. However, i will not let it be something you think in the next 10 years and you start to regret. I really meant every word i said to you on the bed, about how i'm gonna treat you, love you and marry you. I speak nothing more but the truth, not some sweet talk or plainless talk. I will definetly prove to you that i'm worth it and you can really rest your heart on mi. And not because of this mistake, i will leave you or even love you less. I will wait for you no matter what outcome it may be, may it be mi or someone else in future you will be with, i will always remember this as something i did terribly wrong and i will not regret that i loved you all my life. I will endlessly continue to shower you with love and will never give up until you no longer hate mi and start to trust mi again. And i dont think of you so lowly ok, i always looked up to you and always worship you like some Goddess, so please! i respect you alot.. i really do love you for who you are and not what you look like or for that. i really really love you, no one can take your place and my heart will never change.. i will love you very deeply from nightfall to dawn to dusk. So feel my heart, you are the one that i loved most! Right now all i can think is whether i can see you again and whether i can bring you the happiness you have always been looking for. Im sorry for breaking your promise and this will be the very last time.. I'll do anything just to prove to you that i'm a better guy and you can put your heart down on mi. I've made a grave mistake but i seriously want you to forgive mi.. To see you so hurt, troubled and confused, im just very guilty. And worse of all, u hate mi. i really cant do much to apologise but to think of it, my heart still aches. I failed. Made you disappointed in mi. I believe you have second thoughts about mi right now but everything about mi remains unchanged. My love for you, my feelings, my confessions, my promises will still be there. I promise you, i will definately be a better guy!