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Forbes who loves this gal very much

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It just occurred to mi that i have this stupid idea.. totally planned out everything. leave the countdown party and go find her. for what man? haix.. just this thinking. but it really made mi want to go and surprise her.. something hit my mind.. i decided not to. all along i assume that she will be alone and that nobody likes celebrating the new year alone right? so, i'll leave at 11 and cab down to her work place and surprise her at 1159.. don't make an ASS out of U and Me. haha.. but, i feel that that guy will be there too. so, why waste my time.. well, felt bad.. i ps my friends. initially planned to go sentosa before the countdown.. but i decided to go to the church countdown. haix.. what's my new year resolution? haha. new year then say..

well, mel and bel.. i've done my best in helping. hope u two have a great time~

well.. i lost it. totally, really lost it.. no more interest in playing the piano. i never touched it for 2 weeks and i cant even put my mind into it.. i guessed i left alot of things behind mi. practically spent the 2 weeks out, trying to waste myself.. whatever it is, i won't say. shall devote the next 3 days to meaningful stuffs.

im glad i helped bel out.. felt bad buying her present that she wanted to give mel. well, planned a nice new year's eve night for them.. go watch the fireworks. heard the things she wanted to do for him.. how sweet can that be? how fortunate.. there's this saying that if u spent your last minutes of the eve of new year with a special someone, you will be with that special one for the coming year.. nah, not gonna happen to mi.

between friends and best friends:
Friend: has never seen you cry
Best Friend: has always had the best shoulder to cry on
Friend: never asks for anything to eat or drink
Best friend: opens the fridge and makes herself at home
Friend: asks you to write down your number.
Best friend : they ask you for their number (cuz they can't remember it)
Friend: borrows your stuff for a few days then gives it back.
Best friend: has a closet full of your stuff
Friend: only knows a few things about you
Best friend: could write a biography on your life
Friend: will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing
Best friend: will always go with you

Are we friends or are we not?
You told me once, but I forgot..
So tell me now and tell me true,
So I can say, I am here for you.
Of all the friends I've ever met,
You're the one I won't forget..

Haix.. came back from drinking last night. i feel very bad.. came home drunk, with vomit all over.. shit man. should have controlled myself.. anyway, no salt but with lemon, tequila rox~ i heard that 3 shots can knock out a person.. haha. but i went for like 9? funny thing is i can still remain sobber, just that vomit thing only.. ok so, headed to town around the early afternoon. met the gals and tyreon ( an australian dude).. went shop shop, play pool and watched movie. oh man.. got embarassed like 2 times.. have u seen a bimbo cutting a long quene? the way she do it man, everyone will hate us.. but we got great movie seats! haha. next is finding seats at food republic.. wah! should have gone to a restaurant man.. oh ya.. during the movie, she kept making noises.. like awwww the dog die.. awww so sweet.. awww awww awww. And because we sat at the middle, middle row.. she almost fall when she wanted to walk out and like practically stand there and block the view for like 1 minute.. i was like, this is so not gonna happend to mi. but its good when u are buying clothes.. haha. no need to wait.. im not a loser nor a pussy. haha. wanted to buy magnetic earrings.. but they kept asking mi to pierce! i cant man.. not that i don't want but i don't want my ear to get ripped~ and i cant succumb to peer pressure! too bad.. argh~ i must upgrade.. no more topman pls. so overrun by muds.. more people joined us and then off we go to boat quey. in the mrt, this hot girl did a britney spears.. and she smiled. oh my goodness, so sinful~ haix.. everytime drink must pay so much.. and like only vodka, blue label, cordon bleu and chivas. must well they go my house or i drink at home. but luckily the hostess know us.. she offered tila tequila! haha.. no tila. well, i think im not a good friend or a person of power.. all the gals that didnt smoke, smoked. woah.. see how peer pressure works? anyway, i checked on them today.. they are fine. luckily they didnt get addicted. more china girls there last night.. major turn off. then like quite late already.. went to zouk. in the cab, lots of funny stuffs happended.. someone cannot take it and vomitted into the topshop bag.. LOL. then the uncle joked with us.. we got out of the cab not knowing how much we paid.. haha. not i pay can already.. then at zouk. WOAH.. so many bodies lying on the floor. then we walked nearer, there's this vomit stench.. so cool. but zouk was full.. haix.. then like in the wee morning. i left while they went to MOS..

i backtrack to xmas.. was quite fun. more like a family thingy.. went for high tea, then shop then buffet and ice cream buffet.. cant remember much..

xmas eve.. party at gramps house. i forget what i did in the afternoon.. then eat, wine, liquor and liquor cake. woohoo.. wiskey cake is yummy~ even my baby cousin tried some of it.. haha.

then today went for lunch with my mum at imm then rush back and went to raffles to meet my sisters for dinner..

wah.. from now till the new year im so packed.. actually its like the whole holiday. hope the new year will bring everyone happiness~

im back... back from the malaysia trip. well, kinda so-so trip.. the program didn't turn up well but the people there sure make things better. despite the constant rain and all that, it made us feel bonded in a way that we didnt go on our own way, like the rain confined us at 1 place. kinda fun when it was so boring that me and mel need to entertain one another.. i guessed we are like twins. wear shades, labeled clothings and same poses.. the most upsaddess thing is i cant buy my liqour~ argh!!!

seems like i bought all the xmas presents.. haix. the crystal ball is crossed out, too pricey.. i saw a musical box and the tune was auld lyne syne! but its also pricey.. in the end, settled for something else.

actually, im going to ecp tml.. but, last piano lesson of the year and dunno what tang yuen thingy at my gramps house. ya.. so, cant go. next week's gonna be fun! meeting the guys..

maybe.. i was right in the 1st place. u seemed to be better without mi.. isit better that it turned out this way? i hate faking that nothing happended.. i hate leaving things as it is now.. i hate the uncertainty.. please forget mi. for i add miseries to ur life.. for your happiness. i go..

uh-oh.. just gotten home from last night's totally wild night. im still having hangover now.. after the last paper, went to watched movie with 6 galfriends.. and the show is just about 2 words 'he died'. thx guys, there goes my 9 bucks.. saw alot of familiar faces like bouce and his equally look alike girlfriend, wenwei, weiling, rebecca and i forgot the other girl's name. i didnt know girls can eat, their meaning of share is woah.. half my plate gone? and i just got a tiny slice cause they all ate the same dish.. then went to clarke quey. Oh my oh my.. SPGs, ang mohs and belly dancers~ and i saw jamie yeo.. went to the Clinic, the wheelchair is so uncomfortable. regretted not going to Thumper, the beer flasks looks so cool like u cant possibly finish the whole thing.. haix. the shisha thingy so crowded.. then walked to boat quey. went to this pub and sing karoke.. chivas chivas, the classic liqour~ haix.. everyone seems to like get high so easily. so cool man.. i keep telling myself, im not drunk im not drunk. initially im not but after like pure 1/4 of the bottle FYI its considered little but i dunno why like that.. oh wait wait. before that, there's so much drama! socialized and chatted. i know some fishy stuffs going on.. back to it. ya, for the first time.. i was drunk. at least i can control myself and also walked to the toilet. but, but.. i cried. for the whatever question that they asked.. ewww lah. how should i say? they were all so close to mi but gave up on mi because im stupid and now we'r just closing up the gap.. then sing talk sing talk until 2. i think i remembered saying stupid stuffs.. like what type of prawns no leg? answer(lame sia).. then performed magic. haha.. wah, cant stand it man.. so many china girls standing outside. though i am drunk but they are all so yucky.. went to someone's home and drank baileys~ haix.. not my type of drink but still appreciateable. then didnt sleep, talked till morning.. then had pancakes and spaggetti for brunch. then played the piano which i don't know what keys am i pressing. now im home.. next stop, cafe del mar. should i still go out later? i want to sleep..

my my.. look at the time.. i just finished my housework. feeling so home alone.. my folks and sis went for hoilday, leaving behind mi and my super-sick ridden brother. i think its time to hire a maid.. tml's gonna be a long a packed day. heard of shisha? well, im gonna try it out tml. should i or shouldn't i? it's 7x more addictive than tabacco. i think i should just stick to being a drunkard.. awww~ where should i go for xmas buffet? Meritus or Ritz-Carlton? pricey pricey.. haix. should i buy a crystal globe? its for her..

2007 National Piano & Violin Competition at the Esplanade, watch me there.. the festive season is coming. Xmas songs in-checked and ready to play carols.. it's the mid week of the common test. So not used to studying alone.. gosh, shouldnt look back. well, this month's gonna be packed. Had a party last weekend, meeting youyun this friday, going out on sat, wedding dinner on sun, going to desaru next monday then xmas party and new year party. Lots more to fill the in-betweens.

a phrase i have for last week is 'for all the wrong reasons'.

Seems like i hate u alot.. i want to forgive but it always happens. i don't know what's wrong and i don't get it.. u come when u have problems.. u cast me aside when u have none.. i have always been there for u. but, what am i to u? junk? substitute? i did nothing wrong and there u go.. treat mi as transparent and that fucked up attitude. well, fine! u have accomplish what u intended to. im just a..

There is a time for everything:
To every thing there is a season,
a time to every purpose under the heaven
A time to be born, and a time to die
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up that which is planted
A time to kill, and a time to heal
a time to break down, and a time to build up
A time to weep, and a time to laugh
a time to mourn, and a time to dance
A time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing
A time to get, and a time to lose
a time to keep, and a time to cast away
A time to rend, and a time to sew
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak
A time to love, and a time to hate
a time of war, and a time of peace.
Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

If you put your happiness in temporary things, your happiness will be temporary. See the big picture, for your circumstance is used to someone's circumstance.

A life goes by.. romantic dreams will stop. So I bid mine goodbye and never knew.. So close. was waiting, waiting here with you.. And now forever I know. All that I wanted to hold you.. So close.. So close.. to reaching that famous happy end. Almost believing this was not pretend.. And now you’re beside me and look how far we’ve come.. So far we are so close.

I'm just a..

You'll always be in my life..
Even if I'm not in your life.
Because you're in my memory..
You, will you remember me?

But since then I been back down to the end.. I can't believe the things you never said. I can't explain the words I never found.. My whole world should come crashing down, you know. Tell me something I don't know.. and I'll find that I'm always looking 'round behind me'. You said that it's all been said before.. Now I find that there's something I don't know. I lie in my bed, you're running through my head.. Going over and over and over the things that you said. I'm caught in the trap, I'd run like hell right back to you.. Cuz I'm sober with you and you know it beats drinking alone. Cuz you're gone, and you ain't coming back.. Yeah you're gone, and you ain't coming back.